And now back to Rock-n-Roll...
Some Tour Statistics:
139 = Estimated number of chocolate chip cookies consumed (mostly by me)
50 = Total hours spent riding in the car
14 = Times The Finger was given in traffic (mostly by Emily G.)
10 = The number of people in the audience at our Greensboro, NC show
8 = Cities in which we encountered former Athenians
4 = Shooting stars beheld while relaxing in the hot tub
2 = Times we missed our exit on the Pennsylvania Turnpike
2 = Nights spent in a hotel with free cable
1 = Times Andy & I actually had to sleep on the floor (It really pays to be a couple!)
First Stop: Bedford, Pennsylvania...
The first twelve hours of our tour were spent driving to Emily G.'s family farmhouse in Bedford Pennsylvania. We were treated with homemade potato soup, fresh-out-of-the-oven chocolate chip cookies, and the hot tub. Not to mention warm beds-a-plenty, gorgeous scenery, and blueberry pancakes for breakfast... It was very tempting to skip out on the whole tour-thing and just stay at the farmhouse!
Emily's mom sent us off with a giant tub of cookies and some organic, home-grown apples. Mmmmm...
(Incidentally, we're planning to return to the farmhouse to record the next album... Did I forget to mention the recording studio housed in the old kitchen?)
Next Stop: Brooklyn, New York...
What should have been a relatively short drive to Brooklyn turned out to be a harrowing ordeal... To amuse ourselves on an endless stretch of Pennsylvania Turnpike, we concocted a game much like Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon-- you know, the one where you have to link actors and films within six steps. Actually, it was just like this game, only with the added twist of having to replace one word of the film's title with the word anus. As in "My Big Fat Greek Anus." Juvenile, yes, but it kept us so enthralled that we missed our exit off the turnpike TWICE and added an extra hour-and-a-half to our trip. (Really, you should give this game a try...)
We thought our troubles were over until we faced the most heinous of all traffic obstacles: The Holland Tunnel. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why MapQuest would route poor, unsuspecting innocents such as ourselves through the Holland Tunnel. Is that the only way to get from Jersey to Manhattan? Surely not! Why so much trouble for one little tunnel? I cannot even speak of the horror... I've chosen to block out the memory. All I can say is this: DON'T EVER TAKE THE HOLLAND TUNNEL ON A SATURDAY NIGHT! After 45 minutes of waiting to simply enter the tunnel, we learned that we were due on stage in Brooklyn way ahead of schedule (as in NOW!). And it just got worse... Derek's lap-top, which we rely on for backing tracks on a few songs, had broken that very day and couldn't be fixed. Needless to say, the show was an all-out disaster. Really, it was. We all agreed that it felt better to admit it! But at least we were finally reunited with Derek and the rest of Elf Power!
I was so relieved when that show was over! Especially because Andy, Carlton & I had the pleasure of staying the night with our beloved Emily M! She spoiled us with gourmet grilled-cheese sandwiches and forced me to take one of her hedgehog totes. I had the honor of seeing her lovely dolls in person and sheepishly learned that her work area is even smaller than mine... We were able to spend a few hours with her the next day having brunch and wandering around Williamsburg.
That Emily sure is a snappy dresser...
I found the cutest graffiti ever right around the corner from Emily's apartment...
No need for tearful goodbyes, as Emily is moving back to Athens next month! Hooray!
Next Stop: Philadelphia & Baltimore:
I think I liked Philadelphia better than any of the other cities we visited, though I can't really say why. Our show in Philly more than made up for the Brooklyn mishap. We were fortunate enough to borrow Elf Power's laptop for the rest of the tour. During our set I happened to look out into the audience and saw Tony & Kimberly, old friends from Athens. What a nice surprise! We (all ten of us from both bands) stayed in an amazing loft space, where Andy and I were forced to take the lone air mattress. We slept like babies! Those who had visited Baltimore before agreed that we should stay in Philly as long as possible before our next gig. With hours to kill, we all trouped to the local cinema and watched "Hollywoodland." I can't say whether I liked it or hated it... I was too distracted by Ben Affleck's prosthetic nose-tip to care one way or the other.
I think we spent a total of six hours in Baltimore. That being said, Baltimore was memorable only for two reasons: 1-The best sound guy we had all tour, who just happened to be a sound girl... She really knew her stuff! (Imagine that!) 2-Teddy bear man... an enthusiastic, highly inebriated (most likely schizophrenic) fan who enjoyed the show from the street outside the club with his dear friend Teddy bear. Teddy man wore only the finest top-coat with tails and tattered blue jeans, and teddy bear wore shades. As he rolled and danced in the street, I worried that things would become indecent or that he would be run over by a car. At one point during our set, I noticed Teddy bear sitting on the edge of the stage gazing at me with those over-sized glasses, and I lost all control of my limbs. Just for a moment. By the end of the night, Teddy man and bear had drifted off to blissful sleep behind a dumpster. It was oddly touching...
Next Stop: Somewhere in the Middle?
In all honesty, the whole middle of the tour is a bit of a blur for me. Not because I am a drunkard or anything like that, but because being in a new place every single day is rather exhausting. All day in the car, all night in yet another club. I will try to remember the highlights (or in many cases, the not-so-highlights...)
The next couple of shows were in Richmond, VA and Greensboro, NC. I really didn't experience much beyond the clubs, both of which were unusually large. In Richmond, a drunken middle-aged man made a point of telling Emily & me that our music was the worst he had ever heard. (It didn't matter that a dozen others said the show was great... ) I distinctly remember having a terrible time with the audience of ten in Greensboro. That was by far the worst night for me... It was definitely the point in the tour when I would have given my very soul to be at home with my sweet Junebug!
It was a huge relief to head to Asheville, which is a very charming little city despite terrible traffic. The unbearable heat we had been experiencing finally broke, and the endless toll roads were miles behind us! We played our best show yet at a small space called Wedge Gallery. Unfortunately, the sound system was terrible, so our efforts went rather unnoticed. (That is just the sad truth of touring... No matter how hard you try, you're always at someone else's mercy. Which why I have decided we must clone Derek, our bassist, sometimes-vocalist, fix-it-man, sound-guy -extraordinaire!)
Next Stop: Charleston & Columbia, SC:
Andy, Carlton, Emily & I arrived in Charleston with time to spare, so we spent the afternoon at Folly Beach. I hadn't seen the ocean in several years, and it was so relaxing! It made up for the fact that our Charleston gig ended up being at a sports bar filled with, well, just the sorts you would imagine at a sports bar...
Yeah, that's me with the 40 oz. can of green tea...
We spent a few hours in historic district of Charleston, the part where the buildings are all ancient and tiny... I had the odd sensation of being in a theme park and was startled to realize that people actually live there!
Our final show was in Columbia, SC, at a really snazzy place called Art Bar. There were two stages, and we chose the one with the robots and wall of TVs...
Here we are... Music is serious, serious business! (Andy just couldn't help himself in the presence of all those TVs...)
By this point, I really didn't care how the show went (though I'm told it was OK). I just wanted to get back on the road. And we did, immediately after our set and a few quick goodbyes. That three-hour drive back to Athens felt like the longest of all...
Final Stop: Athens, GA:
Whew.... We made it! After resting up a bit, we rounded out the tour with a final final show at Caledonia Lounge, and it was the best we've ever played. Overall, I think the tour was a success. No, we didn't make a lot of money, and we didn't always have a huge crowd. But we had a great time and reached at least a few people! At almost every show I encountered some wistful gal who played flute once upon a time and never thought it was possible to rock... until now! Maybe I've started a rock-flute revolution! At the very least, I survived my very first rock-n-roll tour, which is saying a lot.
Now it's back to the daily grind, which will hopefully be a little less mundane after such a great adventure! Thanks for reading my ridiculously long post and stay tuned for Progress...